Most children are like little sponges — they soak up whatever emotions are around them and they are also very in tune to what their parents are feeling. As such, children in Illinois whose parents’ are going through a divorce may be influenced about how they see the divorce by the way their parents act in general and toward each other. In fact, parents can actually influence their children about how they view the divorce and what roles they believe they play.
Experts say there are three things that shape the tale a child tells and indeed, believes. The first is what parents actually tell their kids about the divorce, followed by what they actually see happening between their parents and then how external circumstances surrounding the divorce affect them — issues like neglect, abuse, mental illness and addiction. Parents need to be mindful that what they say to their children and how they act around them can really affect how the children move forward in a new family dynamic.
Even if there are contentious issues between soon-to-be former spouses, neither should ever put the other parent down in front of their children. Experts also say that although many external circumstances can’t be controlled, a parent can help a child to view them in a way that is emotionally healthy — such as a parent moving away or having to switch to a new school. A parent can influence a child’s interpretation of the circumstances for a more positive outcome.
An Illinois attorney may have tools for a client to help children get through divorce. Having a great parenting plan can certainly help and that is something with which a lawyer can assist a client. A lawyer understands that putting the best interests of the children first is necessary and may be able to help a client do so.